Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Blog Silence...

When a kid-focused blog goes silent, it means either
  • something has happened to the kids
  • something has happened to the mom
Um, both. My sweet 6 year old (see last post) has morphed into a crazy man which has turned me into a discipline diva by day and a crying/praying mess at night. Oh yes, the blog world sees this:

but the pictures don't show the meltdown that happened roughly 30 minutes after these sweet photos were taken. I mean, I could have taken pictures, but then I wouldn't have my hands free for self-defense. Still, I'm trying not to let my memories of Mother's Day dwell on a rage fit (his, not mine) and instead think about a great weekend in Tyler with my grandparents.

Here's my dad with his parents. I'm sure he NEVER pulled any of these stunts as a child, right, Grandmom?

I don't want anyone to ever think that my life is only the pictures I post...smiles and special events. That's not life. And yet, not every challenge we face is meant for immediate public knowledge either. In the blog/Facebook world, I struggle for that balance between sharing and what some might perceive as bragging, being transparent and being too raw. I want people to see how our relationship with Christ transforms ALL parts of our lives, especially the ugly ones. For my child, though, some things are his story to tell another time. Some experiences are better left shared when someone asks to hear our story. As for us, no matter how today looks or tomorrow, I know Owen's story will be one of the transformative power of God. If you're a believer, isn't that your story? How I was...and how I am?

For me, every day is a new one, and it all brings me back to the example set before us. The psalmist said about our God: "He will not always accuse, nor will he harbor his anger forever; he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him."

I'm clinging to that example as we dig in with our firstborn. Not just for him, but for me. I am so grateful that my mistakes are not my identity. The forgiveness, the freedom, the love, the compassion set me back on the right path every day. So, we start today with a fresh start and clean heart and go at it again.

  • The good news for Owen, we're in this for the long haul, and he's worth every minute of it.
  • The good news for us, this behavior is not his norm. Most days, he makes great choices, works hard at the goals he sets, loves friends and family with a fierceness, and shows a determination and focus that would make any obstacle quiver in fear...and he can beat-box.
  • The Good News for all parents, the Lord has a plan and purpose for our children and loves them with abandon. I trust in that for me too.

We take our jobs as his parents seriously: to love, protect, and help him bear the image of his Creator. We are praying for wisdom as we do some course correction on some of our bad parenting habits. And hopefully, one day, when Owen is tempted to list all of our mistakes, he'll extend some mercy to us too. ;)


Jodi said...

Beautiful post. Just beautiful. And such a blessed and PERFECT read for me today... as I deal with MY firstborn. YIKES. Thank you not only of the reminders of mercy but also the reminder that I am certainly not alone is this crazy parenting-gig!!! HUGS, my friend. It has already "been too long..."

Kelly said...

LOVE this!